Will infidelity affect your divorce if your ex cheated on you? Usually, no. Infidelity can be painful, but it doesn’t have much effect on the legal outcome in New Jersey. That’s because NJ is a no-fault state, meaning a judge doesn’t need to find a guilty party to grant a divorce.
Being a no-fault state also means courts typically don’t punish the cheating spouse or consider it when dividing property, determining alimony, or deciding custody. However, if your spouse spent marital money on the affair, a conversation with a divorce attorney might be in your best interest.
NJ No-Fault Divorce
In New Jersey, spouses can dissolve their marriage by claiming irreconcilable differences. They don’t have to prove their spouse did anything wrong to get divorced. Still, NJ courts recognize fault grounds, including adultery.
Filing Irreconcilable Differences vs Adultery
For many people, filing for divorce in New Jersey under the grounds of irreconcilable differences is the most practical path. For others, filing adultery may be a better option. However, the latter requires a high burden of proof backed by evidence and private details in a public court filing.
Moreover, filing on adultery grounds doesn’t automatically mean a bigger divorce settlement. Because New Jersey is a no-fault state, claiming fault rarely changes the financial picture. Many spouses gain little by choosing fault, even if infidelity is undisputed.
Infidelity and Alimony
Your spouse’s infidelity probably won’t impact alimony either. New Jersey’s alimony statue lists the core factors that determine spousal support, and cheating isn’t one of them. Alimony focuses mainly on marital assets and finances, including income, earning capacity, and the marital standard of living. What’s not considered is how each spouse behaved, with two rare exceptions:
- If the affair directly affected the financial situation or economic status.
- If cheating was so extreme that it violated social norms to the extent that ignoring it would prevent justice.
Determining whether your situation qualifies for the legal exceptions can be tricky. Contact a New Jersey divorce attorney today to discuss your case and learn your rights.
The Egregious Fault Exception
The Main exception is a rare legal loophole to ensure justice when conduct is shocking or egregious, meaning a New Jersey court can’t ignore it in good conscience when determining alimony, property division, or custody. Even a humiliating affair doesn’t meet this bar because egregiousness isn’t defined by how heartbroken you are. The cheating spouse’s conduct must have violated society’s basic norms. Talk to your lawyer to find out where you stand.
Cheating Spouse: Property Division and Custody
New Jersey courts divide marital property using equitable distribution. That means courts determine a fair split based on numerous factors. It also means adultery can’t impact what that split looks like, but dissipation of marital assets can.
Dissipation of Marital Assets
Understanding dissipation of marital assets could give you leverage in a divorce involving infidelity. Dissipation is when a spouse spends marital assets or resources on purposes unrelated to the marriage. For example, spending money on an affair. Funds used for hotels, vacations, gifts, and dinners came from a pool of assets meant to be shared by both spouses.
Proving dissipation of marital assets requires careful documentation because it’s your burden of proof. Gather financial records to provide your lawyer with a paper trail. Then, look for signs in bank statements, such as cash withdrawals, payments to unknown accounts, sudden drops in balances, and charges for hotels or restaurants.
The judges want to see that the spending happened during the marriage but did not benefit the relationship or household. A New Jersey divorce lawyer can bring in a forensic accountant to follow the money trail and give you stronger documentation for your claim. Schedule a consultation with Hand & Toker today.
Impacts on Custody
New Jersey courts determine custody based on the best interest of the child, not on whether spouses could be faithful to one another. Cheating doesn’t make someone an unfit parent in the eyes of NJ law, so judges won’t punish a parent just because they had an affair.
But if the infidelity harmed or endangered the children, the circumstances can change. Exposing children to unsafe environments or people could influence the court. Judges weigh whether the affair had a negative impact, not whether the parent had good morals.
Legal Help for a Cheating Spouse
Getting cheated on can be stressful and emotionally overwhelming, but if you plan to divorce, here’s what you should focus on instead:
- Collecting financial records to demonstrate patterns, behaviors, and anomalies.
- Noting unusual spending that might prove dissipated assets.
- Contacting a divorce attorney to channel your valid emotions into a strategy.
In the meantime, don’t retaliate and don’t post about the affair on social media, since what you put on a public forum can be used against you in court. Contact Hand & Toker Family Law for a free, confidential consultation.